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First of all, I want to say that Selly is my 15 year old step-daughter and I think she is absolutely beautiful.
I may have shared with you before that she happens to be large chested and has had to deal with a lot of prejudice due to this. Such as being called in to see the principal for her clothing being "too revealing" when her neck line is actually just as high and usually higher than what some smaller chested girls are wearing on that very same day. I don't allow her to wear any shirts that show cleavage and that would be the case, no matter what her bra size. Anyway, like any teen girl, she is self-conscious of her body and always worried about her appearance etc..
Last week, she was working on making up a Spanish test that she had missed during a sick day. When the class began to go over the results of their already graded tests, the teacher called on Selly as expected and Selly knew that she was about to be asked to step outside until the discussion was over. However, when Selly stood up to go, she was instead told by the teacher, "Go out and walk laps around the building until we are finished. You need to lose some weight." Selly said there was an audible, collective gasp from the rest of the class when she said this. She said she stood there, in shock, waiting, hoping, that the teacher would crack a smile or say that she was just kidding. She didn't. Instead, she followed her first rude remark with, "Hurry up! You're gaining more weight as you stand there." She said she then left the room in tears.
Of course I was livid when I heard this. Any person trained to work with kids and that has been teaching for several years, should know that teens have body issues and comments like that are not only rude as hell but can also send a girl or boy spiraling downward into depression and eating disorders. I planned to call the school the next day. But later, when I was telling hubs the story, he told me not to call, as it might make an enemy of the teacher and she would be harder on Selly for the rest of the year. I told him that I felt she needed to be called down for what she had done and that if she did mistreat Selly we would handle that as it became a problem. Then he "pulled rank" on me and forbade me to call. As I am just her step-mother, he really has the last word. Even though it has never bothered him to let me handle absolutely everything else pertaining to her.
She is really embarrassed and upset. Especially since the woman said this in front of the whole class. I'm not sure what to do. I definitely don't want to just let this slide by. She needs to know that we will defend her. Opinions? Ideas?
I may have shared with you before that she happens to be large chested and has had to deal with a lot of prejudice due to this. Such as being called in to see the principal for her clothing being "too revealing" when her neck line is actually just as high and usually higher than what some smaller chested girls are wearing on that very same day. I don't allow her to wear any shirts that show cleavage and that would be the case, no matter what her bra size. Anyway, like any teen girl, she is self-conscious of her body and always worried about her appearance etc..
Last week, she was working on making up a Spanish test that she had missed during a sick day. When the class began to go over the results of their already graded tests, the teacher called on Selly as expected and Selly knew that she was about to be asked to step outside until the discussion was over. However, when Selly stood up to go, she was instead told by the teacher, "Go out and walk laps around the building until we are finished. You need to lose some weight." Selly said there was an audible, collective gasp from the rest of the class when she said this. She said she stood there, in shock, waiting, hoping, that the teacher would crack a smile or say that she was just kidding. She didn't. Instead, she followed her first rude remark with, "Hurry up! You're gaining more weight as you stand there." She said she then left the room in tears.
Of course I was livid when I heard this. Any person trained to work with kids and that has been teaching for several years, should know that teens have body issues and comments like that are not only rude as hell but can also send a girl or boy spiraling downward into depression and eating disorders. I planned to call the school the next day. But later, when I was telling hubs the story, he told me not to call, as it might make an enemy of the teacher and she would be harder on Selly for the rest of the year. I told him that I felt she needed to be called down for what she had done and that if she did mistreat Selly we would handle that as it became a problem. Then he "pulled rank" on me and forbade me to call. As I am just her step-mother, he really has the last word. Even though it has never bothered him to let me handle absolutely everything else pertaining to her.
She is really embarrassed and upset. Especially since the woman said this in front of the whole class. I'm not sure what to do. I definitely don't want to just let this slide by. She needs to know that we will defend her. Opinions? Ideas?
I suggest you should give her the support she need and always listen to her. About the teacher, talk to your husband and set an appointment regarding that issue about Selly. Any problem can be fixed if we sit and talk in a nice way.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jhordan Kee. I'll update when I have news.
ReplyDelete